Little Victories

I'm excited.

I've been thinking a lot lately about the book I'm currently "writing"--but I haven't been writing. Right after returning from college, I blamed stress for my lack of creativity. I said I didn't have enough emotional energy. And then I continued using that excuse for a while after coming home ... I mean, upsetting situations like leaving college don't just disappear over night, right?

Lately, I've been trying to realize that, hey, I'm okay! I'm home. I have a job. I have plans for next year. I don't need to hang on to that stress.

So I had another reason for not working on my book. I was working through another revision of my last book, as I want to get back to work seeking an agent for that one. My plan was to focus on one book at a time, and my current book wasn't the book I was going to devote time to.

But lately, I've been having trouble getting the name of my current main character out of my head. I missed her story. I was tired of revising the other one.

So I broke down, and I finally wrote a new scene in my newest book.

And I'm excited.

I haven't written a successful scene for this book since before or during my college experience. It feels so good to be back at it!

Little victories can be more important than we think. They can be part of God's shaping us into the people He wants us to be.

Have you had any little victories in your life lately? How could God be using them towards your future?

It's Complicated ...

How often have I said--or thought--that my life is complicated?

Sometimes it's true ... but other times, not so much.

So here's the update about my college decision: I'm going to Bible college. In January.

I'd thought that making this decision would be complicated, but as I prayed about it, I realized that the facts about my situation are clear-cut. It makes total sense for me to go. So what was really holding me back?

Like I said in my last post, I was afraid.

I don't want to relive what I went through during my last college experience. But when a path seems to be God's will, fear is not a good enough reason to say no.

Today I read through the first chapter of Joshua in my devotions. "Strong and courageous" is how I'll have to be to face my fears. But I don't have to make myself be strong and courageous. I don't have to calm my fear on my own.

My God will help me.

Maybe that's why I think my life is so complicated sometimes. Maybe I think it's complicated because I think I have to solve my problems myself.

I'm glad that's not true.

Stepping Forward

Mixed emotions.

That's how I feel when I think back on my few weeks at college. There were good times. I met some cool people, and I learned a lot in such a short space of time. The memories make me sad, though, wishing things hadn't turned out this way.

So it makes sense that now, on the verge of another life-changing decision, I'm hesitating a little bit.

On my dresser is an acceptance letter from a Bible college, the same one my brother attends. I got it a few days ago.

But I haven't sent my reply yet.

Though the classes I'd take there wouldn't be towards a writing degree, they would grow my knowledge of the Bible and its Author. I could get through some college and learn how to handle all the work. I'd have time to think about my writing plans. It all makes sense.

But I am afraid.

I don't want to stay here working fast food, though I'll admit that I've learned quite a bit in that environment too. I have to take a step forward.

But I'm not positive it's the right step.

In the midst of all this wondering and second-guessing, I know what I have to do. I have to pray some more, and then make up my mind. Once and for all.

Tonight. Tonight I'll have a talk with God. And if He wills, I'll have my answer.

I want to move forward.

Have you ever been afraid of a decision you had to make?

Beginnings

Unfortunately, I don't have a lot of time to devote to writing this post. But since it's the weekend after Thanksgiving, I think I'll share five things that I'm thankful for.

1.) My family. I was blessed to see many of them for Thanksgiving!
2.) My church. I learn so much there, and the people are great.
3.) My friends, most of whom have been with me for a very long time, through thick and thin. (And tie-dye and lemonade ...)
4.)  A (sort of) new friend. :-)
5.) New beginnings. The start of a new blog, the start of a new chapter of my life ... who knows what else?

Hopefully next time I'll have longer to write, but for tonight, I'll just leave you with a question. Hope to hear from you!

What are you thankful for?